Yay LegendGirl, you should be proud!

I'm taking my back injury as a wake up call to regenerate and get stronger the right way - not too fast. Plus eating healthy (I've been on and off). I've been eating fewer carbs and a lot of greens (such as kale and arugula) and other vegetables, and fish. As I start to run again I may have to increase carbs - that would mean more whole-grain bread or potatoes, not something empty.
My concern is whether I'm actually losing fat or just water, because glycogen stores hold water and when those stores are used on a lower-carb diet, the water is released. That accounts for big initial losses on such a diet.

Harpy, Nachtvlinder, HopelessRomantic:
I have talked to a doctor since I wrote that post. But it's like no doctor ever takes me seriously about this. People in general always seem to think that when I say I suffer from insomnia, I mean that I have a hard time falling asleep, or that I wake up often.
And sometimes I wish it was just that. I know, I know. A bad sleep pattern can and will screw with you, but it just sounds easier to deal with.
I haven't slept since thursday. Haven't really been eating either, because I don't have enough energy do cook food. I did clean up a bit yesterday, though, so I haven't just been sitting in front of a computer for the past two days.
I'm scared that I'll slip into a psychosis at some point. I can live with the weight gain, the headaches, the feeling of always being cold, the slurred speech and the feeling that everything is happening in slowmotion, but I just can't deal with the thought of going insane.

I have these pills somewhere. I think they're in my drawer. They were prescribed for my depression, but they make me really drowzy, so I think I'll take them when it gets dark, and then I'll go lay in the bed. They usually knock me out for about 12 hours, and 12 hours of sleep sounds so good right now.

Alice, sleep is sooo important for you and, like you said, it can screw with you if you sleep very bad or not at all! I cannot imagine how frustrated you must be if your doctor doesn't believe you.

If you always sleep this bad, then maybe you should ask your doctor whether there are 'sleep laboratories' where you live. That are specialised clinics for people with problems falling asleep, sleeping the whole night, or not being rested from sleep. You have to spend the night there, hooked to all kind of monitors. They check how you sleep there, and what kind of treatment you could benefit from. Also, since you say that you're feeling life is in slowmotion,the weight gain and you're always cold, I wonder whether that is the result of lack of sleep, side effects from your medication, or that you might have a thyroid problem. Has your doctor ever tested you thyroid thorouhly (with all the different thyroid hormones checked, not just one indicator)? If not, that might be worth a shot. It's done with a blood test. I'm not a doctor, but it might explain some problems. (PM me for some more info.)

I really hope you do sleep tonight (or today, for that matter) and don't slip into a psychosis. If you feel or feat that that is happening, please tell your doctor. S/He might be able to help you. If you don't feel like cooking, which I understand, then maybe you can eat some salad or heat up some soup with a sandwhich. Having something in your belly might help you sleep.

All the best, and lot's of good sleep! *hug*

I have been tested for thyroid problems two years ago, but the doctor found nothing out of the normal. I don't take any medication at the moment except for my BC pills, so it's not side effects.

I don't know if my doctor will refer me to a sleep lab. It seems like he's thinking that my best option right now is my pills, which is fine and all, but it's not really a permanent solution at all. Plus, the kind of sleep I get from them is not ... well, it's this dreamless state where I just lay there, and I can't be woken up. I'm sleeping, sure, but it's not the same as just falling asleep naturally.
I'm not sure if there is a sleep lab nearby, but I'll ask the next time I see my doctor. I imagine I will have a hard time relaxing with all those funny things attached to my body, though



Alright. Now I'm waiting for the girl I bought the snake from to come over with it, then I'll eat a sandwich, and then I'll take two pills and hide under the covers for the rest of the night.

Alice, I hope things get better for you soon. Hopefully you can get to a sleep lab and figure out what's going on.

I think I've pulled a muscle in my upper thigh. Not sure how I did it, but it makes going up and down stairs annoying. Also, sometimes it twinges randomly when I'm walking. Not fun. :/

I hope things get remedied soon, Alice! Have you tried any herbal teas? I just tried Phix Sleep, it's a powdered drink mix that tastes like lemon crap. It let me sleep a normal restful natural sleep. One that I wish I could get without the help of sleep aids.

Dragonwings, hope you're resting that leg!

I still haven't been able to exercise much at all. I'm trying, I really am. I vacuumed yesterday and had to sit down and take a break twice! Just from one little room. I wish things would get better soon, it's just frustrating when you can't even clean your house or walk to the mailbox.

Thanks. I'm trying to rest it, and it does seem to be getting better at the moment. Hopefully it'll continue that way.

I need to exercise more too. Just take it a little bit at a time. Every little bit helps.

If anyone has been wondering, I've been sleeping like a normal person for the last 4 nights. I don't know how long this will last, but I'm glad I can sleep.


On another note, I've been losing weight. I haven't been eating a lot, and the kilos have been falling off me. I'm down to 52 now. I used to weigh 67. I've lost, hm ... my math isn't that good ... 15 kilos, I think, in 5 weeks. Now I have a thigh gap, which I have to admit is nice, since I used to get chafing from my thighs rubbing against each other when I walked. My friends have been commenting it, one was even shocked when I took off my hoodie to show how much smaller my waist and tummy is now. One of them tried to lift me and was surprised at how easy it was. I have gone from an E cup to a D. Some of my clothes are too big for me now ... I'm down to a european size 32/34 (xtra small/small) now , where I used 38 (medium) before.
I have very mixed feelings about this. I try to take care of myself, and the way I lost all this weight is not healthy at all. I've been struggling with anorexia, and I still do to some extent, but the last five weeks have been really bad. There's been a lot of stress in my life, and I ignored my own basic needs. But I love how my body looks right now (may I just once again say that I like my thigh gap?), even though I'm getting a bit too close to becoming underweight. If I can just somehow maintain this weight, maybe put on 2 or 3 kilos, I'll be happy.
I have been eating today, if anyone is getting worried reading this. Pasta with curry sauce and chicken. I'll make some soup when I've taken a shower later this night.

I'm glad to hear that you've been getting some sleep! Try to remember to eat too, ok?

I've been losing weight too lately. I'm just not hungry lately. Maybe it's just depression from not being able to get out and exercise like I want to? I had to keep taking breaks last night while out grocery shopping. I can't believe how exhausting it was. My energy level has just dropped so much lately. I start sweating and get tired from just getting dressed.

This sucks!

Alice, I am relieved to hear that you were able to sleep! Given the stress that you have been going through, I am not surprised at what has been happening. Sounds like you're doing the best you can to take care of yourself.

HopelessRomantic, have you seen a doctor for the heart problems lately? because if you're having more problems than usual with that, go take care of yourself. And yes, I can see feeling down from not being able to exercise as usual.

Dragonwings, OUCH on the leg.

I'm still having some back soreness (healing will take time) but am getting stronger and have had more back, abdominal and leg exercises added to my routine.

Hey you meager girls I have 5-10 kilos to share. I hope you won't stop eating. My girl friend was anorexing for 2 or 3 years. It was no fun when her stomach stopped working. I tell you.

I hope you feel better now that you are sleeping better!

Although I totally understand that you love your thigh gap (how do I get one too?), I must say that losing 15 kilos in 5 weeks is a lot. So, don't forget to eat once you're feeling hungry, please!

I promise I won't stop eating. I just went through some stress (a sick mother, a bad break-up and worries about job and education), and I should have been more careful. I suffered from anorexia from I was only a big child until just recently, and it has taken it's toll on my body - I'm not even sure I can get through a pregnancy, my teeth are in bad shape, and my body didn't grow as it should. I will never let it go that far again, because I might not survive, and I don't want to die yet.
The things is, after a bit of time, you lose your appetite. For me, this takes 3 to 4 days. That's when my body goes into starvation mode, and my stomach just kind of gets used to being empty, and starts to use up all the fat instead, and then, the muscles, which I think is why my back and legs have become achy and weak.
So since I don't feel hunger (yet), I eat whenever my friends eat. I just need to keep up with the regular meals, and then my body will let me know when I need more food.

I'm 5'8, 150 pounds, the small end of a medium frame size. I am the ideal weight class for my type. I eat around 700 calories a day worth of Meat and fruit. I don't eat any dairy or grain. I drink juice, water and tea. I avoid preservatives at all costs.

I clean myself daily. I play soccer once a week for two hours.

I hope you continue to do well Alice. We're all here for you!

My x-ray on my leg came back fine. So it looks like it's just a pulled muscle. Which is annoying but at least the steroids I'm on aren't affecting my legs.